


Steven Universe - Don't break this one!

by Ashizian



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Coming of Age, Gen, Homeworld (Steven Universe), Homeworld Hierarchy (Steven Universe), Identity Issues, Origin Story, Prequel, Protective Siblings, Regret, Relationship Issues, Science Fiction, Science Fiction & Fantasy, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Discovery, Sibling Rivalry, Trust Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:41:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26929066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ashizian/pseuds/Ashizian
Summary: A look back at Pink Diamond's youth, just as she is about to learn the most important lesson of her life.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 15





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Steven Universe - Ne brise pas celle-là !](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23751397) by [Ashizian](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ashizian/pseuds/Ashizian). 



“ _Everything begins with your stance!_ ”

Yellow Diamond stands aside. There is something terrifying about her imposing stature. Her stern eyes are fixed on a glowing tablet in her hands. She doesn't even dedicate a third of her attention to Pink Diamond, who’s standing in the middle of the arena with a sword in her hand. What the hell was going through her mind? Why would she ask for fencing training? The room is gigantic. This is where the Gems come to watch the Quartz fights. These duels are much appreciated, especially by Yellow and her minions. A hundred Rubies sit excitedly in the bleachers, ready to react to the slightest move. Their attention makes Pink uncomfortable. Luckily, Pearl, her servant and friend, is discreetly encouraging her.

“ _What are you waiting for?_ ”

This is the first time she’s ever carried a weapon in her life! What is she supposed to do with that thing? Hit someone, obviously. Pink Diamond stabs at the air, then does it again, unsure how to do better. The Rubies applaud her every move like crazy. It's already annoying.

“ _No, no. Awful! Keep your stance wide, keep your body lowered._ ”

She does her best, but she’s enraged: Yellow isn’t even looking! How can she guess what’s wrong with her movements? Pink tries to move with the next blow, but stumbles.

“ _As you're moving forward, balance is the key! Right foot, left foot. You can walk, right? Make an effort, come on!_ ”

Pink sighs, returns to the middle of the arena and starts over; first a slash, then two, then a thrust.

“ _Now go faster,_ ” Yellow hisses.

One more slash, then two, then a thrust. Good grief, what’s the point? Pink Diamond’s boiling with anger. She puts her heel back, turning her head to check that there are no obstacles:

“ _And as you're moving backwards, keep your eyes on me!_ ”

As she tries to heed this strange advice, Pink Diamond takes a wrong step and falls. All Rubies freeze. The entire room is plunged into dismal silence. Everyone knows what is likely to happen if she gets angry, but no one wants to clean up afterward. But, it's a fact, Blue Diamond asked her personal guard to come to encourage and help Pink to stay calm: the Rubies therefore obey and start shouting encouragement. These Gems don't have complex minds, but their honesty seems to be visceral.

A Gem is faithful to the role assigned to her. It was built for this specific purpose. Each "model" exists only to fulfill its function, which is noticeable even in its personality. In truth, there is no evidence that a Gem would know how to deviate from the place assigned to her, even if she wanted to. Rubies serve as bodyguards and protect more valuable specimens. In the end, it doesn’t matter how many survive their mission; you can produce hundreds more with few resources. A Pearl is pretty. The perfect companion, but no more important than a chair. Although there are many pieces of furniture more valuable than a Pearl. And finally, Diamonds exist only to command. Things have always been this way.

Pink asked Blue about the Diamonds a long time ago, specifically their place in the universe. She answered, gently:

“ _Our creators needed an abundant workforce to rise beyond our universe. They created the Diamonds in order to direct and organize the multitude of the Gems on their behalf. One day our job was done and they just left us behind. The Gem Homeworld has been left as is, without purpose. We continued to maintain it, hoping they would return._ ”

“ _Do you think that’ll happen?_ ”

“ _No. I believe that now the future rests on our choices. But we are Gems too, and therefore just as subservient as the others to the purpose that’s been instilled into our minds. We can’t change anything about that._ ”

“ _Why can't I remember? I am a Diamond, too!”_

“ _Our creators never needed to complete your design. It's not that you're useless, sweetheart. I'm certainly not implying that! You were created to solve a problem that did not arise, that's all. When they left, White Diamond didn't want to leave you incomplete. We worked so hard to finish you, to infuse into you what was missing, as best as we could. Unfortunately, we are not the creators. That's why you're not as... well, you know what I mean._ ”

Pink Diamond doesn’t know why she’s thinking of that story again. Because it's nice? No, maybe because it explains why other Diamonds can't help but view her as inferior. She has the terrible feeling that they will never see her as an equal. The youngest, forever. Everyone instinctively understands their place, but not Pink. She’s only ever existed at the whim of White Diamond. Her life doesn't really belong to her. She gets up, returns to the middle of the arena and resumes the choreography, to perfection this time. She only needed a moment to succeed, but Yellow still doesn’t pay attention. She's always busy! Nothing matters, apart from her colonies.

“ _There, that's how it should be done!_ ”

“ _How can you know that? You’re not even looking at me!_ ”

Yellow looks up, staring at Pink for the first time today. The unfortunate Gem feels herself shrink, as if the sudden interest of her older sister was reducing her bravery to nothing.

“ _You'll learn that we don't have to stare at you to know everything about you, Pink. Besides, whatever you might say, I can see this lesson isn’t engaging you. I have work to do, if you don't want to take this exercise seriously, why should I waste my time?_ ”

“ _It's..._ ”

“ _No, Pink, I do not want to hear another of your excuses. How about completing something, for a change?_ ”

“ _In that case, Yellow, come and show me yourself how to improve!_ ” Pink Diamond retorts with irritation.

She flashes her sister a hostile look. No way she’ll let herself be looked down upon again! Pink lifts her sword and points it toward Yellow Diamond, who sighs and rubs her hand across her forehead. One movement of the arm is enough for a decorative spear to detach itself from the wall and enter her palm. Their size difference is monumental, but Pink Diamond won’t take this into account. Maybe if she manages to beat her, Yellow will finally give her some respect! But a second later, the rose-colored Gem flies back, crashing painfully to the ground. One hit! It only took one little hit to get swept away!

The Rubies are silent. It would be foolish to shout encouragement in such a situation. Pink stands up without a word. Her face is twisted with rage. Fresh humiliation! Yet another field where she cannot win! She sees red. The ground bursts open. The Rubies throw themselves to the ground to take shelter. Her Pearl pulls back, but doesn't seem more worried than usual. She is about to signal for her Diamond to calm down, but nothing would be more inappropriate. It's not a Pearl’s place to be a mother figure to her owner. Her role is only to be pleasant to live with. If someone finds out that their relationship goes beyond professional cordiality, her memory will be mercilessly erased! No way. She doesn't want to forget her Diamond.

“ _Pink, calm down!_ ” Yellow requests, with a softer voice.

She approaches, kneels in front of her sister and puts her huge hand on Pink head. The little one calms down quickly.

“ _I know you want to prove your worth, but that's your problem: eagerness. You have to be patient, to accept that it takes some work. Nothing comes easily._ ”

“ _I would like to be given a chance! None of you ever trust me! Ever! I never have an opportunity to show that I can manage on my own! Why? Why don't I already have my own colony?_ ”

“ _Not this again. Blue and I have talked it over often enough: the answer is no! You're not ready for..._ ”

“ _What if we asked White? Why would it be up to the two of you to make this decision?_ ”

“ _White? You know very well what to expect from White Diamond. Do you think her answer will be different from mine?_ ”

Obviously her answer will be the same as Yellow's, but Pink would like to hear it from her mouth. She may be able to convince her.

“ _In the meantime, this lesson is over, Pink. I want to see you return to your quarters._ ”

“ _What, you don't..._ ”

“ _Silence! I wasted enough of my time already! You go to your room and stay there until you are called in for your evening duties._ ”

Yellow Diamond walks away, beckoning the Rubies to follow her. They all seem sorry for Pink but go away without a word, leaving Pink with her Pearl. When the door closes, she angrily throws her sword at the wall. The weapon shatters into pieces.

“ _Can I help make this moment more pleasant, my Diamond?_ ” Pearl asks in a soft voice.

“ _No. Unfortunately, nothing will make this moment bearable for me._ ”

If Pink Diamond may appear tiny compared to her sisters, Pearl herself seems ridiculous compared to Pink. The modest Gem causes a Ribbon Wand to appear in her hands and begins to dance frantically, in the hope that it will appease her mistress. After a minute, her Diamond says:

“ _I'm glad to have you with me, Pearl. You’re the only one who makes me feel like someone who matters. I appreciate that._ ”

“ _Thank you, my Diamond! You are everything to me!_ ”

Pearl gives a huge smile. How lucky to be in service to a Diamond! The other Gems know how to be cruel and sometimes deliberately cause suffering to Pearls. It's wonderful that Pink Diamond is so nice. The little one doesn't believe she has any value. She is aware that deep down, her only use in this world is to be pretty. From time to time, not without shame, she fancies herself a friend to Pink Diamond. Maybe the latter thinks so, but a Pearl has no right. If someone finds out about this disgusting idea, what will they do to her? This is proof that there is something wrong with her mind. But it doesn't matter. At least her Diamond will never cause her any harm. She won't make her suffer. Thanks to Pink, even something as pathetic as a Pearl can hope to find happiness.


	2. Chapter 2

“ _Why won’t she understand?_ ” Pink Diamond mumbles.

The Gem is enraged and hits a wall in anger. Some tiles fly off on impact. She walks away, growling. If Yellow Diamond really wants to lead alone, then so be it! Pink will let her handle her stupid invasion in peace, in this filthy Moon Base. Why can’t she ever put herself in her shoes? Blue, Yellow and White all live with clear responsibilities, colonies, fleets, armies and servants. They even design their own Gems!

What does Pink have for herself? Not the smallest colony, no fleet, no army. She isn’t even entrusted with her own servants! She must be content with what the other Diamonds are willing to lend her! Her only creation? An insignificant modification of the Quartz soldiers, in order to make a variant more in line with her own preferences—that's all Yellow allows. This is how the Rose Quartz were born, the only difference with their Amethyst cousins being cosmetic. Good luck making White Diamond agree to deploy one in a battlefield. By putting her foot on the teleporter, Pink Diamond realizes that her Pearl is far behind, at the top of the stairs. The unfortunate Gem is too small to keep pace with her mistress:

“ _Faster, Pearl!_ ”

“ _Yes, my Diamond!_ ” She replies, starting to run.

Her stature does not allow her to move quickly, but she tries. The little one ends up joining Pink, impatient, at the bottom of the stairs. The Diamond just grumbles. She climbs onto the teleporter and disappears with her maid, reappearing a minute later at the palace. Her anger refuses to die down. The only thing that comes to her mind is to go immediately and ask White Diamond to give her a colony. This must end! Pink can't stand being the youngest anymore. But this desire comes with a terrible fear. White isn’t easy to deal with. She was born with a vision for her compatriots, a goal: to make everything better, more effective, faster, more efficient. When Blue announces a big project, White proposes one ten times better within the hour.

All her demands are huge, and the Gems that cannot rise to her level end badly. Many people say there is sadism in her personality. But that is unfair to White. She feels no "pleasure" in doing what she does: this is her function. She was the one who divided the Gem society into castes, not out of personal preference, but because it seemed more efficient that way. The figures do not lie: since her reform, everything has indeed progressed. White Diamond subsequently deduced that removing individuality would make Gems considerably more productive. As a result, free will no longer exists. The way White sees it, it all comes down to calculation.

In the end, she doesn't care about the well-being of others. What matters is that the Gems thrive as a collective. Diamonds have an unofficial hierarchy: the one that controls the most resources is the most useful. Yellow fights to keep her second place. She is terrified that White may considers her "imperfect". If White questions her value one day, what function will Yellow have left? It should therefore be very easy for Yellow Diamond should to understand Pink’s feelings, but no! She's so obsessed with her sickly urge to shine before White that nothing else matters, except maybe Blue.

The latter is closer to Yellow than White will ever be. It has been so since the beginning of time. Yellow acts, Blue thinks and White perfects. Where does that leave Pink? Her Pearl observes in silence. She's waiting for somebody to ask her something. Pink Diamond often identifies with her maid: she too feels like she only exists be pretty. Is that why she feels so close to the little one? If Yellow finds out that Pink is treating her Pearl with more familiarity than necessary, she will take her away that very day. A Pearl is not a toy. It is a tool. No, worse: an accessory! Yellow would say to her: "Do you want to have fun? Then I will give you a Spinel, but your Pearl has to stay in her place! It's wrong to allow her to believe that she is worth more than that!" Pearl is enough. Pink doesn't want a Spinel.

What a hypocrite! As if Yellow didn't treat hers with the same kind of familiarity! But then, White has decided so. A Pearl is an accessory created to make Gems more useful. Period. Another principle imposed by White to satisfy her own vision. All hypocrites! Too bad. Pink Diamond starts walking determinedly towards White Diamond’s quarters. Enough playing around. It's time to act. Every step gives her a terrible impression. This is a bad idea. But she keeps moving and makes herself go faster. Her Gem gets hot. Is that what fear is? No, she shouldn't let herself be stopped by a mere sensation! Feeling are a weakness, Yellow would say.

Pink Diamond passes in front of the Amethysts which guard the door to White's quarters. They do not dare to interfere. Pink looks furious, and everyone knows what can happen if she gets angry. No one wants to be shattered. Diamonds will solve this problem. She approaches, puts her hands against the doors and pushes so hard that they come loose and fall.

“ _White!_ ” she yells at the glittering humanoid, not so much out of anger but to keep up her courage.

“ _Oh, it's you,_ ” she retorts.

If Yellow is huge compared to Pink, White would make Yellow look like a dwarf! The Diamond is so big that Pearl can probably only see her legs. Her eyes are freezing cold. About ten Peridots take note of all her suggestions. Seeing Pink, they move away by reflex. The last time a Peridot got in the way of Pink Diamond, the pieces had to be cleaned up all over the ballroom! The worst part is that she who was responsible for this carnage noticed absolutely nothing. To her, it was just a weird noise under her slippers. The poor Gems shake, but keep smiling. It's best not to anger White Diamond either. It would be worse. The unfortunate little gems feel like they’re caught between a rock and a hard place. They know that their value is barely greater than that of a Ruby. Their destruction would have no consequences. A slight inconvenience, nothing more. Violet 38's Kindergarten would only have to produce more Peridots to compensate.

Everyone knows that Pink Diamond is a monster. The last millennium has anchored this image in the minds of every individual, from the wisest of Sapphires to the most modest of Rubies. There are those who respect her power and those who are terrified of her violence. The Jaspers esteem her very much, obviously, but they're not dumb enough to stay in the same room as Pink Diamond when she has that look on her face. The worst part is that Pink is not aware of her own reputation. She shatters without even realizing it. What could be more terrifying? However, despite all this, there is a third category of Gems, rarer and more discreet, of which Pearl is the main representative: those who love her. After all, she embodies a fundamental, yet silenced, principle: individuality.

“ _What do you want, Pink? You know I don’t have much time for your frivolities._ ”

White makes an effort to be kind. She doesn't like to be interrupted, but enjoys Pink's company so much that she doesn't dare to blame her for coming. Actually, why doesn’t she come more often? Yellow must be responsible for this. A commendable attention, which prevents White from being disturbed, but still: what a pity! Pink has such strange and often pleasant manners. White appreciates her more than she should. It's almost a guilty pleasure. Today her face is twisted with frustration and rage. What did Yellow say to her this time? What has Blue done wrong again?

“ _I want a colony! You all have dozens of colonies and I have nothing! I am a Diamond, I want to finally be seen as such!_ ”

“ _‘I want,’ ‘I want,’ “I want.’ Always those words. Never ‘the Gems need this’ or ‘It would be appropriate, for the sake of all Gems, to do that.’ Again and again: ‘I want!’_ ”

“ _Does it change anything, whether I want it or whether it is for the sake of the Gems? Yes, White: I want it!_ ”

The giant lady sighs. This little one never understands what people try to tell her. All that goes through her head is her own opinion. How can she ignore the common good in this way? How many times has it been necessary to repair all the damage she has caused? So many immaculately cut Gems disappeared in a fit of anger, damn her!

“ _A colony is not a toy, Pink. Our entire civilization will have to commit resources to the invasion process. You will have obligations and imperatives of result. This new colony must be quickly effective, otherwise all the Gems will pay the price! I don't think you're ready. Such an effort requires qualities that you lack. Blue is patient and calm. Yellow is precise and reliable. You are brutal and angry. Why should I entrust such a huge burden to someone who thinks only of herself?_ ”

Pink Diamond is speechless. Her anger is rising to levels she never imagined it would ever reach. She stomps the ground, which cracks loudly. The Peridots flee, but are stopped by an immaculate beam launched by White:

“ _Stay right here, we’re not done working!_ ” she snaps.

The unfortunate gems are terrified and do not know where to hide. Pink Diamond's Pearl moves in their direction, trying to calm them down with words. Amazingly, she succeeds! Her words hit the nail on the head. The Gem is smiling, sweet and sincere. She seems happy, which White does not fail to notice. However, the Diamond carefully avoids to speak her mind. Right now, that's not a problem. Unimportant foolishness. The little gem returns cheerfully to the feet of her mistress.

“ _Why are you so convinced I would fail? You keep telling me I'm not ready, but if you never let me do anything, how can I ever achieve anything? No, this is just an excuse! The truth is, you're afraid I will be better than you!_ ”

“ _Better than me? Ha!_ ” White reacts.

She laughs! Her mirth is dismissive: no matter how much she appreciates Pink, this one will never surpass her. It's such a stupid idea that she can't help but mock it.

“ _My dear, you really don't know your place? You always have new ways to make me laugh!_ ”

“ _That's enough!_ ”

Pink Diamond unleashes her anger, projecting a shockwave in all directions. It breaks columns and part of the ceiling. The energy released is such that White Diamond collapses. The whole planet has just suffered a brief but violent quake:

“ _I'm tired of being looked down upon!_ ” howls Pink Diamond, as a second burst of energy emerges.

A Peridot flies away but, luckily, comes out unscathed. White Diamond gets up heavily. Her face has turned cold and stern:

“ _What imprudence! You want a colony, but look at this appalling spectacle! And I should trust you after this? It is..._ ”

The Diamond does not finish her sentence. It's not her younger sister's tantrum that stops her, no. White has seen her do it all too often. She points her gigantic index finger towards Pink's feet and exclaims in a cold, dark voice:

“ _Another one! What a waste! How many Gems will it take for you to shatter before you are finally satisfied?_ ”

Pink Diamond does not understand where her sister is going with this. She looks down and notices something broken at her feet. Pearl. What remains of her. Her anger is suddenly extinguished, replaced by absolute terror. Her Pearl is in pieces! What... why? White Diamond is moving for the first time in a century. She reaches out her hand and lifts the shards, all of which land in her shining palm.

“ _I was the one who gave you this Pearl! You don't even respect my gifts!_ ” White's voice is filled with immense disappointment.

Pink Diamond seems paralyzed. Pearl cannot be destroyed, it’s impossible! No! Suddenly, the pieces reassemble and return to their original place. White's will is enough to accomplish such a miracle. The little one reappears in a bright flash. Half of her face is fractured. Her gem looks intact, though. It doesn't matter: Pink is reassured. Pearl survived! Her terror abates all at once... until Pearl gives her mistress a one-eyed glance. There is only pure horror in her expression. Her only friend, looking at her like she’s a monster! Pink doesn't know what to say.

“ _I’ve tolerated your tantrums for long enough, Pink. You don't deserve this Pearl. I take it back. This kind of gift is not suitable for irresponsible people like you. Always breaking what is perfect! Out of my sight!_ ”

Pink turns and leaves the room, shaking. Her Pearl is... why? She was right here, at her feet, and the next moment all that was left... Her horrified expression is now etched in Pink Diamond's mind and refuses to disappear.

“ _What have I done?_ ” she asks herself, crying, before running to her room.


	3. Chapter 3

How many years have passed since Pink Diamond locked herself in her room? 10 years? Maybe a little more. Gems have a strange vision of time. Each day can last a second or an eternity, depending on their emotional state. For Pink, this confinement seems to have lasted a millennium. She can't forget Pearl's gaze. It is as if it were engraved. All that horror in her eyes. Pink Diamond hates itself. It's her fault. If she hadn't let her stupid anger guide her, Pearl would still be here! Her life would go on as usual. Now, nothing interests her any more. The activities that previously entertained her seem bland. Without her... why bother?

” _I’m such a fool!_ ” Pink moans, curling up where she sits.

The furniture has been abandoned to its fate in a corner. Pink doesn't even have the courage to lie down on her own bed anymore. She stays on the ground and simply waits without moving. Maybe her emotions will pass eventually, with enough patience? Will she have to wait a long time? Blue comes to see her regularly, but her gentleness is no longer enough to bring any comfort. Yellow also came. Pink Diamond was surprised to see her trying to be understanding. This is more than she would have thought possible. This incident with Pearl may have awakened an old, but terrible memory. Nothing can prove it, but Yellow’s approach to this topic was unusual for someone with her pride:

“ _Pink, there are things that cannot be rebuilt. What we destroy is often destroyed for good. If luckily you manage to fix what you damaged, it will never the same. Your Pearl is... White will not give her back to you. She doesn't think you deserve her gifts anymore. You disappointed her. I'll... we'll get you another one when the time is right._ ”

“ _Is she okay? I didn't know White could... mend Gems._ ”

“ _Pink, White Diamond has the power to perfect everything she touches. Something broken is imperfect, by definition. However, her talent seems to have limits. I believe it does not restore everything. The mind remains broken, for example. To answer your other question... I don't know how your old Pearl is doing. Her gem is in White's hands, certainly stored somewhere. You upset her to the point that she refuses to hear about it! I admit it's a feat, even for you._ ” She takes a short break and then goes on, joking:

“ _Who knows, maybe one day she will miss you so much that she will take it out of her box to make herself a servant?_ ”

It's exceptionally rare to see Yellow dabble in humor, but Pink doesn't have the heart to laugh. The subject is too serious, too painful. Before this, she would have found it amusing that someone could even imagine White Diamond in the company of a Pearl! It's too vulgar for the "great gem" that she is. Why won’t her pain stop? Pink feels so bad that she doesn't notice that Yellow is trying to lighten the mood. And yet such an event should go down in history!

Time is passing. Pink Diamond doesn't care how much. Each minute seems to last a century. White never comes and refuses to see her altogether. In truth, she wouldn't go through such trouble, even in a normal situation. Pearl was her gift! White Diamond gave her life with unique specifications. Obviously, Blue and Yellow received theirs in a similar fashion, but everyone knows this one was special: it was perfect for Pink. A superb success, all the more impressive since White Diamond is incapable of understanding Pink Diamond. After all, Yellow shares her relentlessness and Blue her calm. She can create gems accordingly, but with Pink, how do you conceive of the incomprehensible?

Good grief, why hasn't she got her anger under control as Yellow kept telling her? Her sisters are right, Pink is not worthy of receiving a colony. She feels like she is not ready for anything. Her dismal room makes her sick. It's messy, tasteless. This room seemed so alive before then. Today, the slightest thing reminds her of Pearl. Blue quickly got tired of this ugliness: she had the place changed to add some Pebbles. These tiny Gems have the sole task of cleaning, organizing and repairing rooms. They quickly became friends. The little ones are funny and not used at all to being thanked. Why do such charming creatures come to believe themselves worthless? One evening, when Blue was about to leave for her quarters, Pink finally had the bravery to ask her the question which tormented her:

“ _I've shattered a lot of Gems, haven't I?_ ”

“ _It doesn't matter, sweetheart. Gems are replaceable. We have Kindergartens for that._ ”

“ _Broken Gems never come back. They are gone for good._ ”

“ _You are right, but why let that bother you, sweetheart? Each Gem is important, but sometimes a disaster cuts short their usefulness. This is how it is._ ”

“ _I'm a disaster, then. I guess you could hardly think of anything more suitable._ ”

“ _Oh, sweetheart! You're not a disaster, just... wilder than us. Gems are born with a purpose, but since we didn't understand yours, we weren't able to shape your development. I’ll try to be more severe to guide you, to teach you how to become a real Diamond._ ”

Blue's way of avoiding the question is telling enough: no matter how many Gems are gone, there have already been too many. Her reaction, however, is not what Pink would have hoped for: she doesn't want Blue to act like Yellow too! She doesn't need another sister imposing her own vision of what a "real Diamond" should be. Why is everything always getting worse? But no matter: this time, she must not give in to anger. Rage has destroyed too much. Enough. Now she is content to accept her sister's recommendations. Blue Diamond, satisfied by this turn of events, took it into her head to reward this sudden obedience. She therefore offered Pink a unique place, where she could "forget her worries": a garden.

Pink Diamond had never seen greenery. These weird things don't work like Gems at all. They live and grow, but do not disappear when their physical form is damaged. No, on the contrary, they are injured or destroyed. Such fragility is fascinating. Blue only saw anomalies in these creatures and decided to keep a few out of intellectual curiosity. However, an organism that requires careful attention to thrive can be used to educate her younger sister:

“ _What do you want me to do with such things, Blue?_ ”

“ _You will have to maintain these biologicals, allow them to survive. If you succeed, it will be because your qualities of patience and responsibility are improving._ ”

Blue Diamond has a sweet face. One can feel that being "severe" is absolutely not in her nature. She prefers reason. Blue is like water: an inexorable force, which transforms the world with its insistence. Gems believe that Yellow is the most powerful after White. They are wrong. The strongest is Blue. Behind her immense gentleness hides an implacable will. We're talking about the creator of Sapphires and Lapis Lazuli, after all. Nothing in the universe could make her change her opinion, not even over ten millennia. Of all of them, Pink feels closest to Blue. She is the only one who understands her doubts, but here’s the issue: the Diamond also has her own vision of the world.

In the Great Diamond Authority, Blue embodies thought. She therefore admits no other way of interpreting events than her own. Yellow, at least, accepts that she doesn't personify spirit, but action. Thus, you can discuss with Blue but not negotiate, while you can negotiate with Yellow but not discuss. As for White, you can neither negotiate nor discuss! A creature who considers herself perfect will never accept anything from anyone. Yet White is unable to think or act on his own initiative. She only knows how to perfect, hence her tendency to always stay still. The Diamond naturally dominates all the gems, by simply making "perfect" what was not before its intervention. Within this hierarchy, Pink increasingly feels that her burden is to destroy.

Fortunately, the plants have a calming effect on her mood. With practice, Pink Diamond begins to enjoy taking care of them. She even becomes competent! There is something really odd about the idea of nurturing a species so alien to Gems. Do you hurt them? They are not necessarily destroyed. They often repair themselves, while a Gem is broken for good. However, this is not their most fascinating quality. Pink has observed, after a few decades of work, that these creatures change over time. They are not fixed on a single "function", but are constantly metamorphosed. What was her surprise, the day she discovered some of these biologicals give birth to new flowers. This facade "fragility" would therefore not be a defect, but a hidden quality: unlike Gems, "plants" can progress beyond their limitations!

These discoveries motivated Pink Diamond to make the garden its main home. She spends a lot more time there than in her own bedroom, experimenting with new ways to change this amazing life form. It was almost by accident that she discovered an evolution in her powers: she can now regenerate plants in case of damage or alter their mutations. Could it be possible that, under appropriate circumstances, even a Gem could exceed its condition? Obviously, the Diamond was careful not to reveal such information to her sisters.

This activity had a positive effect on her manners, to the point that Yellow came one evening to bring her a gift to encourage this progress. Pink recognizes the packaging well: a small golden box. This is where are stored Gems that just came out of a Kindergarten, but are still waiting to be delivered to their final workstation:

“ _I thought a little more company would make you happy,_ ” Yellow says, gently setting the box down.

The object opens by itself and releases a pink gem. It sparkles, they can hear it laughing, before taking on a humanoid form:

“ _I'm so excited to meet you!_ ” the little one sings, wrapping her long stretchy arms around Pink's body, who can't resist her.

“ _What is that?_ ” she asks Yellow.

“ _A Spinel, Pink! Our creators made them for their entertainment. I felt that it would be an appropriate reward. You had this bad habit of using your old Pearl to play. Now, this is no longer necessary: you have something for that! In addition, it is a toy designed to withstand anything. You won't have to worry about damaging it by accident._ ”

So this is what the famous Spinels look like. Pink often heard about them, but had never seen one. She is quite cute, kind and seems to have only one goal: to make her owner happy. Yellow is not wrong, maybe this little Gem will distract her. Having a new friend can't hurt.


	4. Chapter 4

Pink Diamond has been forced to stay in her room for several days. She doesn't like being here anymore. It has become too difficult to ignore the gaze of the other Gems: many are staring at her with the same horror that was in Pearl's eyes. Her life in the garden kept her away from it all. Why did Blue and Yellow force her to come to this year's great ball? All the festivities organized by the other Diamonds are boring to death. Pink's sole activity is to sit still, smile, and listen to the servants singing her praises. Even worse this time: the same people who look at her in terror were forced to come before her throne to enumerate each one of her qualities! Why does she have to go through this? Would this be a way for White to remind her of her mistakes again?

Memories come back to her, like the day she was offered her Pearl. It was the best moment of her life. The centuries that followed brought with them unprecedented happiness, as well as pleasant nonsense. How many times have they locked her in the Tower? This miserable prison, built specifically to punish her? It seems that this is the only structure on the planet that can resist her temper tantrums. Most of the time, her only fault was having fun. Other Diamonds reject any form of distraction and do not understand its usefulness. It's not for lack of trying to change their ways, though.

For centuries, Pink has personally organized all the balls and parties held at the palace, as a reward for every accomplishment of her sisters. Yellow succeeds in an invasion? It's time to party! Blue is designing a new gem? Let's prepare a ball! White leads something to perfection? Take out the confetti! They seemed to enjoy it, for a while. Until White and Yellow got tired of it and stop coming. What was the point of making such an effort, if two-thirds of the guests no longer bother to come?

Pink remembers that with each one of her mistakes, they always threatened to take away her Pearl. It was their best argument! Losing her was something she feared more than anything, if only for a few days. More than once, she was confiscated until Pink learned how to "behave like a real Diamond". So Pink would pretend to be good Gem for a month or two, then start again. White and Yellow seemed terrified to see her fraternize with Pearl. This is why she never had Pebbles in her room, until recently: Yellow feared she would become too friendly with them. Anything to prevent Pink from having any positive relationship anywhere.

She used to draw a lot. An effective way to overcome boredom, but that did not last. She also tried her hand at sculpture, without success. She was even given, for a short time, the task of naming the Gems coming out of the Kindergarten! White changed her mind quickly when she saw a dozen Pyrites arrive in her quarters, all named "Fool's Gold" and numbered in a highly fanciful way. Of course, Pearl was confiscated and Yellow made a annoying speech about the importance of taking your job seriously. This joke was funny enough, however, to justify the punishment. Besides, Blue enjoyed the prank, since she was the one to bring back her Pearl the same evening, telling her "to avoid, in the future, making her laugh so much while she is preparing an invasion".

“ _It's boring!”_ exclaims Spinel, before insisting even more: “ _It's boring, it's boring, it's boring!_ ”

“ _Come on, Spinel, calm down._ ”

For the past few months, it has been lovely to have Spinel nearby. She turned out to be very funny and helped her endure the terrified eyes of the other Gems. All the creatures of this palace watch her as if she embodied their inevitable destruction. Pink Diamond can't help but hate herself.

“ _What are we going to do today, my Diamond?_ ” Spinel adds.

She gets on the bed and walks through Pink's hair, looking at her with a huge smile. The latter gets up, grabs the little one between her fingers and puts her in front of her feet, answering:

“ _Let's find a joke! Something that would make the Rubies I saw hanging out in the hallway laugh._ ”

“ _Yes! It'll be fun! Quick, quick!_ ”

In the end, Pearl's disappearance still weighs heavily, despite the presence of this new friend. Time has passed. A century of games and laughs in Spinel’s company. Yet the image of Pearl never left Pink’s mind. Not even once. She perfectly remembers the scattered pieces. Her eyes full of horror. Pink doesn't even dare to approach White's quarters anymore. Everything there is tinged with sadness. However, and for the first time in a long while, other gems are laughing in her presence! It's nice to finally have some creatures around that don't make her feel like a monster. Spinel doesn't quite understand why “entertaining others” makes her Diamond so happy, but that doesn't matter. All that matters is that her mistress is happy! The habit quickly stuck and, when Pink is not locking herself in the garden, she spends her days brightening up the life of as many Gems as possible.

Yet her action is quite limited, since Blue and Yellow have not left their subordinates with Pink in a long time. She didn't understand why before. Today, she unfortunately has no trouble guessing the reason. As the Rubies begin to burst out laughing at Spinel's antics, Pink feels a strange presence:

“ _Pink Diamond? I am here._ ”

The little voice comes from below, it sounds like a... a Pearl!

“ _Pearl?_ ” she asks, suddenly taking a step away, noticing Blue Diamond's maid. The little one has her hair in front of her eyes, which makes it difficult to distinguish her face. Her voice is soft but incomprehensible to anyone who is not seriously paying attention.

Pink struggles to hide her disappointment. For a second, she sincerely thought her Pearl had returned to her. Spinel approaches at full speed:

“ _Hey, little one! What do you want with the great Ponk Diamond? The great Pink Diamond, sorry. It's difficult to say._ ”

“ _My Diamond asked me to deliver a message to your Diamond, here it is: ‘Sweetheart, you wanted to visit the Kindergarten where the Diamonds were born. I finally got White's permission. However, I'm sorry: my presence is required on one of my colonies. But do not hesitate to go yourself! My Pearl will guide you.’ End of the message._ ”

Pink Diamond's face lights up. Finally! White agreed to let her see the Kindergarten where the Diamonds were made!

“ _Let's go now!_ ” Pink asks impatiently.

“ _Yes! Come on!_ ” Spinel reacts.

“ _As you wish, Pink Diamond._ ”

The three start to move towards a teleporter, which leads the group past a crystal bridge. The structure passes over a lake containing a silvery metallic liquid and leads to a sort of spherical building without any decoration. On its roof, we can see a fossilized injector. Its shape is unique. It seems more advanced than anything the Gems have been able to produce. Pink Diamond does not really know how these machines work. All she remembers is that a fluid is put in it, which, mixed with the raw resources of a planet, creates new Gems. Depending on the composition of the compound and the resources available, different models are obtained.

“ _Here is the Diamonds Kindergarten! It was the first structure built on our planet. The creators sent that injector into the crater of this volcano and, several centuries after the initial injection, four Diamonds were born. This process has absorbed all the energy of the planetary core. It is White Diamond who, later, ordered that the crater should be filled with mercury, mostly to hasten your gestation, Pink Diamond._ ”

The little servant steps onto the bridge, which lets Pink notice that a hundred Gems covered with a veil stand on each side, perfectly still. They seem to be decorating this place... or watching over it. As she gets closer, the Diamond discovers that they are Pearls! Each time Pink walks past a pair of them, the little ones kneel down, heads on the floor. It's awfully embarrassing. Damn it, White, why Pearls? Is this still some kind of lesson? It's cruel! She tries not to linger, seeing those gems on their knees hurts her.

Unfortunately, Spinel finds it very amusing that they bend down on command and decides to take the opportunity to jump from one to the other, just to see if she can make them make a mistake. Pink’s new friend suddenly seems to be getting so... superficial and disturbing. Everything about her reminds Pink of her own behavior before the incident. Her egocentricity, her blindness to the suffering of others. That childish way of seeing everything as a game. The more time goes by, the more Pink sees herself in Spinel just as she did with Pearl before. Except this time, the Gem reflects the worst of her! Spinel represents everything Pink Diamond would like to see disappear in herself. The slightest word, the most insignificant grin irritates her a little more every day. She’s a walking mockery. She feels like a thorn in Pink’s side, or a record player which would repeat over and over again: "That is who you will be forever: a stupid kid!"

“ _Spinel, that's enough!_ ” she says sharply.

The little one stops without a word. She does like torturing the Pearls. Her mistress always recoils as soon as one of those things approaches. She has never asked to play a game that involves them! These scoundrels make her Diamond uncomfortable. That is why Spinel is merciless: everything that makes Pink Diamond unhappy deserves to suffer!

The group reaches the entrance to the sphere. A minimalist work, more sober than what Gems are used to making. The smooth surface is made of a strange material, both silvery and sparkling. Chrome? No, maybe platinum. It’s very large inside. There are murals on each of the walls, as well as four holes in the ground. Each is the size and shape of a Diamond, inscriptions are engraved in front of them. The words are strange, it seems to be a more simplistic version of the language of gems.

“ _This is the place where the Diamonds were born!_ ” the little Pearl exclaims suddenly, kneeling down, head against the ground.

No Gem would have the audacity to look at the place. Spinel herself knelt down, not without some irritation. Pink Diamond approaches, touching the murals with her fingers. Each hole is easy to recognize, since it shines with the same color as the one that came out of it: Blue, Yellow, White and Pink. Looks like the floor has been vitrified. Pink Diamond is moving towards the inscriptions. She understands their meaning, but with difficulty.

“ _Do you know what all of this means?_ ” she asks Blue's maid.

“ _Yes, Pink Diamond! My Diamond translated the texts. What do you want to know?_ ”

“ _Everything. I want to understand everything!_ ”

“ _The large symbol in front of the yellow opening means ‘one that acts’ and the text translates into: ‘through action, we forge our destiny.’ The one facing the blue opening means "one that thinks" and the text: ‘through the mind, we see the path to greatness.’ The white opening, for its part, is decorated with the symbol ‘one that perfects,’ below which we can read: "through renouncing the easy way, both mind and action can achieve excellence.’ And lastly, yours, Pink Diamond, is more... difficult._ ”

“ _What do you mean?_ ”

“ _My Diamond has found suitable words, but has not been able to decipher their exact meaning. Your symbol translates to ‘one that transcends’ and the text to: ‘beyond excellence, life can be created.’ The thing is, we do not understand what ‘transcend’ means, and therefore..._ ”

“ _Nobody knows what my purpose is._ ”

“ _Indeed. My mistress believes that you had to accomplish a mission if our creators did not reach their goal, unable to comprehend what it was about._ ”

Pink Diamond watches the room. Each hole is positioned in the same way as in the flag of the Great Diamond Authority: diamond-shaped, with Blue and Yellow on each side, White at the top and Pink at the bottom. A clear hierarchy. White dominates and Pink brings up the rear. She will indeed be last for all eternity. The one that nobody can understand, because it's impossible. The only Diamond whose burden will remain inexplicable. How to find her place in these conditions? Pink notices that Pearls are cleaning the room, blindfolded. It's too much! She comes out. Blue's maid follows immediately, with Spinel just behind:

“ _Is everything all right, Pink Diamond?_ ”

“ _Yes... that will be all. Let's leave this place! I will not find anything more here._ ”

“ _So be it!_ ” concludes the Pearl.

The little Gem is content to follow the Diamond in silence. Spinel uses her extendable arms to play tricks on her, but the maid ignores her. Pink Diamond feels foolish for having thought that such a visit would make her feel better. The very idea! It's even worse now that she knows she has no role! She puts her foot on the teleporter and leaves without even waiting for the other two.


	5. Chapter 5

Pink Diamond is in despair: decades have passed, but the world is not changing. This short visit to the Diamonds Kindergarten did not improve anything. In the end, her relationship with Spinel is the only thing that progresses. Pink having had no Pearl in a long time, the Gem took the opportunity to take over part of the work entrusted to them. The only problem is, if there is one thing she proves incapable of, it's to have structure. Pink Diamond has never had such a bad assistant. A Pearl knows how to manage your appointments, organize your belongings and give structure to your daily life. Spinel only ever wants to play, so her competence in these areas is quite reduced. What’s worse: she doesn't understand the difference between fun and seriousness.

Not to mention that Pink Diamond feels increasingly ambiguous about the little Gem. On the one hand, she appreciates her maid. She is the only creature who can offer her moments of relaxation. But on the other hand, the Diamond hates her. Every day, Spinel does her best to provide her with new activities, but her futility and childishness quickly make her unbearable. Each one of her actions reminds Pink of her old ways. Thus, behind the facade of games and laughter, hostility roars. A horrible wish. The Diamond would like to abandon her somewhere, with all of her mistakes, and move on. However, without Spinel nothing would be left. She would return to a daily life of isolation and sadness.

So here she is, forced to endure the company of a mirror constantly reflecting the worst of her personality. Spinel is not Pearl. She never will be. Pink understands it now: someone who breaks her only friend in a fit of anger no longer deserves to be happy.

“ _What are we going to do today, my Diamond?_ ” Spinel begins.

It's the same routine every morning. Good grief, why is she smiling? There is nothing funny!

“ _Are you okay, my Diamond?_ ”

“ _Yes, perfectly. Let's play a game! Something that can amuse a Lapis Lazuli. There are some in front of Blue's quarters. Let's go!_ ” Pink answers with a smile.

Liar! You're not doing well! Besides, the Lapis Lazuli annoy you. These gems are haughty, contemptuous and... destructive, she thinks. Yet Pink gets carried away by her own lie and, strangely, the smile of that Lapis cheers her up a bit. She feels herself becoming as hypocritical as the other Diamonds. Why are her emotions so contradictory? Why does her guilt never abate?

Pink hardly ever leaves the garden. It has become her main home. An obsession never leaves her: she wants her own colony. However, her reasons have changed. All that interested her before was to become her sisters’ equal. Today, Pink Diamond wants to produce Gems to replace those that her rage has destroyed. A colony comes with its Kindergarten, which can create life out of nothing. A miracle she dreams of being a part of. It would be some kind of "second chance", a way for the Diamond to make amends, but she doesn't dare ask Yellow yet.

“ _My Diamond! What are we going to do today?_ ”

Spinel seems sincere in her actions, but is she really? What does she think of her existence? Pink Diamond tries to ask her:

“ _Spinel, are you happy to be with me?_ ”

“ _I don't understand, my Diamond._ ”

“ _I want to know if you are satisfied with my company, if your situation pleases you._ ”

She hesitates to answer. Deep in her heart, Spinel is happy with her relationship with Pink. Since the creators left, the other Gems no longer need Spinels. What is the point of keeping a specialist in entertainment and fun, in a world where only efficiency matters? Her fellows were therefore put away for eternity. Well, that was true until that wonderful day when Yellow came to get her. She chose her, among all her sisters, to amuse a Diamond! What an honor!

Spinel would never have dared to dream of it. Pink Diamond is an angel. All that matters now is making her happy. She would like so much to make the melancholy in her eyes disappear for good. The smile of her mistress has the effect of a drug. A rare event that causes euphoria. Every second with her is a delight. The Gem is convinced that her mistress loves her too, how could anyone be more satisfied? Spinel is aware that her feelings are irrelevant. It's not her opinions that matter, but Pink's, so she simply retorts:

“ _If you are satisfied with my services, I am, my Diamond!_ ”

No, Pink thinks to herself, this little gem does not understand the question. She now has the certainty that her maid is blind to the emotions of others. A tool for a purpose. Her goal is limited to being funny. That's all she can do. Only the mission interests her, like any gem. Spinel will never replace Pearl. Why did Pink think, even for a second, that she could? No. This young one is just a warning: This is what you really are, Pink. This is what you look like under your responsible monarch makeup. Who would trust such a frivolous thing? Who would give her a colony?

This is how, unfortunately, the interested party turns out to be ignorant of how her mistress perceives her. A terrible irony, because it is her emotions that blind her. The poor Gem is doing her best to be the greatest possible Spinel. She even agreed to follow protocol, calling her "My Diamond", despite the habit irritating her. She would like so much to just call her "Pink"!

Returning one evening to her room, Pink Diamond is surprised to see Yellow and Blue waiting for her in front of the door. This is unusual for them:

“ _Pink! There you are, finally!_ ” Yellow begins dryly.

She seems to be holding an object in her large hand. A golden box.

“ _We have a present for you, sweetheart!_ ” Blue adds, impatient. Her face is decorated with a radiant smile. A rare image.

The Diamond walks away and places her package on the ground, which opens to release a white gem. The creature takes shape. It's a... Pearl! Yellow Diamond clears her throat, then declares solemnly:

“ _We are proud of your efforts, Pink! You haven't done a single folly in decades and your manners have improved dramatically. Your progress is an example of seriousness. You are starting to look like a real Diamond! Only your organization leaves something to be desired. So I took the initiative to have a Pearl created. Be careful, it is not the same as the old one. You must not have fun with this one! You play with Spinel and you work with Pearl, is that understood?_ ”

Pink remains speechless. She is sublime! The texture of her body, but especially her eyes. There is no horror inside, but that warm expression unique to Pearls. Still, the Diamond can't help but back away. Her thoughts are spelled out by Blue, though she doesn’t realize it:

“ _We don't want her to end up like the last one, okay, sweetheart?_ ”

“ _Yes, Blue,_ ” Pink replies gloomily.

“ _Well, we leave you in her company. Pearl!_ ” Yellow adds.

“ _Yes, Yellow Diamond?_ ”

“ _No games or familiarity. Is that clear?_ ”

“ _Very clear, Yellow Diamond._ ”

“ _Perfect!_ ”

The two Diamonds go away, leaving Pink with her new maid. She can't help but stare at her. The little one does not react. Pink is her Diamond. She can do whatever she wants with her. A Pearl is only an accessory. Spinel arrives instantly and freezes before the Diamond can notice her. What is a Pearl doing here? Pink Diamond hates these things! Wait, she's got a ribbon around her neck. Maybe it's a gift? Why would anyone give her a Pearl? She will have to be supervised and watched on a daily basis, otherwise this fool will make Pink miserable!

She was so sad the first time Spinel saw her. The gem has worked so hard to fix that, but now here comes a Pearl comes to ruin everything! There is no way she can let Pink Diamond suffer! She will protect her Diamond! Spinel approaches and exclaims:

“ _My Diamond! We have a new friend! How about playing a game to celebrate?_ ”

The little Gem throws a nasty glance towards her future colleague, who doesn't react. This thing is too stupid to understand. Pink turns around and answers cheerfully:

“ _What a wonderful idea! Let's go!_ ”

The trio enter the bedroom and spend the evening doing exactly what Yellow has just forbidden: playing. Pink Diamond discreetly looks at her Pearl. This way of moving, of speaking, of acting... everything is the same. Although, not entirely. This model seems more "stern", with discreet colors and prudish manners. She remains magnificent.

“ _Can I do something for your service, my Diamond?_ ” the Pearl asks.

That voice! Why do they all have such a melodious accent?

“ _No, but thank you. Spinel, Pearl, I must go for a little while. Stay here!_ ”

“ _Yes, my Diamond!_ ” the two gems answer as one.

She slips away to breathe. It's too many emotions at once. In her room, her maids remain still and silent. They have no reason to be friendly. However, Spinel wants at least to make an effort of maturity. If a Pearl is to enter in the life of her Diamond, it is better that it be on her terms:

“ _My mistress doesn't like Pearls, you know?_ ”

No answer. Her interlocutor just stares at her without saying a word.

“ _You have to stay in your place!_ ” she continues, with a louder tone.

“ _Yes, my Spinel! You are right, my Spinel!_ ”

His reaction gives her a shiver of excitement. The Gem can't deny how nice it feels to be seen as a superior by... no! This is not what she must focuses on! She rallies and concludes:

“ _It's for the good of my Diamond. I wouldn't want anything to happen that would make her sad._ ”

Pearl offers an angelic smile in return. She remembers what Yellow asked her yesterday, the day she was commissioned: "You have to make Pink happy, in your own way." If keeping her distance helps her accomplish this directive, then so be it! Who better than a Spinel to know how to make someone happy, after all? Yellow gave the order that they furnish her with all the tools necessary to organize the daily life of a Diamond, as well as some training programs and, more unusual, an encyclopedic knowledge of culture and technology of the Gems. Anything that could help her mistress make better decisions. The little one feels proud, but obviously within the limits of propriety. A Pearl remains an accessory. It should never be forgotten.

Pink comes back to her bedroom, trying not to show how terrifying this situation is for her. Above all, don't break this one! she repeats to herself over and over. Eventually, the Diamond tries to clear her mind with another topic. If Yellow and Blue trust her enough to offer such a gift, then perhaps asking them for her first colony is no longer impossible. By being careful and reasonable, there is a real chance of convincing the other Diamonds. Creating life out of nothing, that would be a great adventure!

Despite this pleasant prospect, Pink cannot help but observe her Pearl. She whispers: "Don't break this one!" The little Gem looks at her for a moment, curious, then goes back to looking impassive.


	6. Chapter 6

“ _Yellow, I would like... no. Yellow! I want... certainly not._ ”

Pink is standing in front of her sister's quarters. She hesitates to go through the door. Any time the Diamond wanted to request a colony, a setback prevented her from doing so. Why did Yellow and Blue have to enter into a competition just as she felt ready? Today she is in doubt again, but she has been delaying the inevitable for too long. However, Pink doesn't want to appear impatient. So the Diamond took the opportunity to resolve her conflict with White. It was less difficult than expected, because even she recognizes her progress.

“ _I learned that Yellow gave you a Pearl, as well as a Spinel,_ ” she asked Pink one day.

“ _Yellow and Blue, actually. It's not..._ ”

“ _Ah? Really? I had requested for you not to be given gifts. However, I imagine I was probably a little too harsh, starlight. You have proven yourself able to become a real Diamond. I'm happy. I was afraid this would never happen!_ ” White interrupts.

“ _Thank you._ ”

This habit she has of not listening to anyone! That’s exactly why nobody ever asks her anything. Eventually, nine centuries passed before the little clash between Yellow and Blue ended. Nine centuries, damn it! Why did they have to act like rivals? How important was it to know which of the action or the mind was more effective? Pink ignores the cause of their argument, but she knows that White must have been involved. Everything she says causes problems.

Pink Diamond had no choice but submit to a boring routine. She spends most of the time with Spinel, who now lives in the garden. Now that the Diamond is obsessed with securing a colony, plants aren't as important to her anymore. Her maid has therefore taken over and is taking care of that as well as possible. She's not good at maintaining things, but the place stays clean. Pearl lives in her room. It is the territory that is attributed to her.

Yellow wants it that way: Spinel is a toy, and the garden turns out to be a playground. On the other hand, a room remains a place for living. A space where we expect the Diamond to be serious. Her Pearl must organize a tidy daily life. Despite the centuries, Pink still struggles to even look her in the eyes. It is a joy to be in her company, but above all an anguish. The memory of the shards of her last Pearl is always etched in her memory. Her guilt becomes unbearable. All those destroyed Gems that will never come back! She needs a colony. This is her only chance to solve her problem. She can finally forgive herself for her stupidity... and leave it all behind.

That's what matters: becoming a true Diamond and righting her wrongs. She is already imagining the thousands of Gems that will come out of her Kindergarten. All that life created from dead matter! Pink even cherishes the foolish hope that she could design models that "change", that evolve and draw inspiration from biological life. She doesn't know how, but it motivates her. If Pink Diamond does not have an assigned goal, then she intends to create one.

Finally, she finds the strength to go see Yellow in her room. Her sister is at her desk, inspecting the results of her colonies:

“ _Hello, Pink!_ ” she begins, without looking.

“ _Yellow. I wanted... I would have liked... I..._ ”

“ _Pink, ask me what you want, but quickly! I have to work._ ”

“ _I would like a colony._ ”

Yellow freezes, then resumes her task, answering:

“ _You're not ready. I know you've made an effort, but it's too early._ ”

“ _I would like to make a contribution! You create Gems and help our people to grow... it's my duty too, don't you think?_ ”

“ _What a superb change of attitude! White would love to hear that from you._ ”

Yellow Diamond stops what she is doing, turns and takes a seat in front of Pink, before adding:

“ _Managing a colony is a demanding job. I admit, our empire has been enjoying a period of glory lately, but every invasion costs us dearly. If you fail... it may take us millennia to recover from the shock, you see?_ ”

Pink can't understand, no. If Gems are so successful, why would an invasion be dangerous? She prefers to avoid questioning her for the moment and simply answers:

“ _I understand._ ”

“ _The resources that White constantly requisitions to make her colonies perfect are largely... and this tendency to invade only poor sectors, just to prove us that she knows... but it doesn’t matter._ ”

It's rare for Yellow to have such frustration in her voice. She goes on:

“ _Okay, listen, I'll discuss it with Blue. If she feels like you can do it, I'll follow her opinion. I don’t think you’re ready yet... but why not, after all? I’m sure I’m too picky. A colony is not such a bad idea._ ”

“ _Thank you, Yellow! Thank you!_ ”

“ _Yes, yes! Nothing is done yet. I have to speak with Blue and, assuming that she actually agrees, we will then have to convince White!_ ”

After that, Pink did not hear from her for a year. Work remains the priority of her sisters. You better not expect a quick answer. One day, Pink Diamond was in her room with Pearl, when she had the pleasure of receiving a visit from the Yellow Diamond's Pearl:

“ _Pink Diamond!_ ” she says dryly, before continuing without delay: “ _My Diamond lets you know that Blue has accepted your request. They will now defend your claim with White Diamond._ ”

“ _It's fantastic!_ ” she retorts as she jumps up, surprising her own Pearl, who falls backwards.

Yellow's servant takes a short bow and withdraws unceremoniously.

“ _Did you hear that, Pearl? That's wonderful!_ ”

“ _What is wonderful, my Diamond?_ ” she asks, getting up. The poor little gem did not understand anything.

“ _I may have my own colony!_ ”

“ _It's wonderful, my Diamond._ ”

Pink approaches Pearl and takes her in her hands, dancing with her as one would dance with a doll. The little one lets it happen. Her face remains impassive. In her heart, Pearl feels like she could cry with joy: her Diamond holding her in her hands! Of course, she mostly feels like a rag being shaken out, but what does it matter? For the past few centuries, Pink didn't even dare speak to her. Physical contact is like a revolution! It is often said that her Diamond does not like Pearls, however nothing in her attitude confirms it. Maybe Spinel deluded herself into believing it after all. In Pearl’s eyes, Pink is someone warm, gentle and committed to the health of all Gems. Her maid has never seen her angry. Never. She was told that she could be difficult, but it is not true! She turns out to be, by far, the sweetest of all Diamonds.

How dare the others spread such vile rumors about someone so good? The little one tries to stay calm. A Pearl who dares to be combative can only be defective, even with such a rightful reason. Defective Pearls are shattered, that's all they deserve. Yet, would someone like Pink let a Pearl, however imperfect, be destroyed without reacting? At the end of the afternoon, the Diamond leaves her room and goes to her garden. It's a routine. Despite spending her days there, Pink is no longer interested in Spinel’s games. All that matters is what she was told.

“ _Is something wrong?_ ”

“ _Everything is fine, Spinel. I'm thinking._ ”

“ _What are you thinking about?_ ” she asks, twisting her face.

“ _I will soon have my own planet. Maybe._ ”

“ _Fantastic! You’ve been wanting one for so long!_ ”

“ _Nothing is confirmed, Spinel. Yellow and Blue agree, but White must agree too._ ”

“ _You want me to go say a word to her? I'm sure she won't resist my... elastic charm,_ ” she responds, waving her extendable arms.

Pink remains speechless. Was that supposed to be a joke?

“ _I don't think that's a good idea._ ”

“ _Too bad, that would be fun!_ ”

“ _Spinel..._ ”

The communicator starts ringing. Pink, who was not expecting that, rushes towards it to see what it is. Her maid follows discreetly. The screen lights up, revealing Blue and Yellow:

“ _What’s going on?_ ” Pink asks.

“ _We spoke with White, sweetheart. For the first time, in all the time that I've known her, she decided to let us do what we wanted!_ ” begins Blue.

“ _A surprising decision,_ ” Yellow adds with a sarcastic smile.

“ _Am I going to have my own colony?_ ” Pink asks, in shock.

“ _Yes, sweetheart! Isn't that wonderful? We already have a planet for you! An ideal place, full of resources, Ear…_ ” The Diamond hesitates.

“ _Earth,_ ” Yellow specifies. Her face is shining with satisfaction. Chances are high that she was the one who picked the location.

“ _Yes, there it is, Earth!_ ” Blue adds.

Spinel begins to jump for joy, screaming:

“ _Earth!_ ”

Pink Diamond is ashamed to be with Spinel, precisely the Gem that makes her feel the most like just an irresponsible kid. The little one jumps a second time, causing further discomfort, then climbs onto her back. Damn it, that's enough! Now is not the time! she thinks, without daring to say it, for fear that Yellow and Blue will change their mind.

“ _There are still things to be settled, of course. You are going to have gigantic responsibilities! It would be appreciated if you could come back. We need to start discussing the invasion,_ ” Yellow concludes.

“ _Very well, I'll be right there!_ ”

The communicator turns off and Pink walks towards the teleporter. Her maid follows, but the Diamond waves for her to stay back as she walks on. The little one refuses. Suddenly, Spinel grabs her mistress’s hand to get her attention. It's a happy day! We should have a party to mark the occasion, she said to herself. But a different idea crosses Pink’s mind. All the attachment she felt for this gem has just been replaced by one thing: hatred for all that she stands for. No, Pink Diamond will never be a real Diamond if she continues to play with a Spinel. This era is over. Now comes the age of responsibility. Her childishness and self-centeredness must stay behind, for good. Otherwise, what's the point of having a second chance?

“ _Here in the garden, let's play a game. I'll show you how it's done,_ ” Pink sings, smiling, before kneeling down and putting her finger on her maid's nose.

Spinel radiates joy. A game! What a fantastic opportunity!

“ _Here in the garden, stand very still._ ”

“ _This'll be so much fun!_ ” she sings in response.

Pink Diamond starts to smile. The little one feels a powerful euphoria. Her Diamond is happy! Pink gets up and walks with a decided step towards the teleporter, while Spinel remains motionless. The Diamond puts her foot on the machine, but hesitates. Shouldn't she... no, never mind! Her maid will eventually get bored and leave. Pink is tired of constantly feeling guilty. She activates the teleporter and leaves the place, probably forever. Goodbye, guilt! Goodbye, looks of terror! Farewell to the old Pink Diamond!

Farewell, Spinel.


	7. Chapter 7

“ _I'll lead the brunt of the invasion,_ ” Yellow exclaims.

Pink Diamond is moving as fast as possible. She tries to stay behind her big sister, who rushes down the hall like an arrow. It's difficult to keep up.

“ _Is this really necessary?_ ” Pink asks.

“ _Yes. It took us almost ten millennia to perfect our technique. This is your first colony, so I want you to watch me in action. Next time, this process will be entirely under your care._ ”

“ _Very well, Yellow._ ”

Pink isn't unhappy that another Diamond is taking care of this. She wouldn't have known where to start. The corridor opens onto a square where thousands of uniformed Gems await, as well as a hundred ships. Their new uniform was created in the colors of Pink Diamond. This is the army and fleet she dreamed of in her youth. Why does it all seem so irrelevant to her now? Her soldiers salute in a perfectly choreographed movement, uttering a clear:

“ _Welcome, excellency! We are at your service!_ ”

Pink shivers before such a sight. She feels the weight of a gigantic responsibility crashing onto her shoulders. The Gems fall back into parade rest. There are all kinds: Peridots, Amethysts, Bismuths, Nephrites... Two Lapis Lazuli also stand a little to the side. They wear Blue's uniform. She only lends her specialists, nothing more. A Lapis terraforms planets and Blue Diamond knows how to take care of this task better than anyone. They are therefore, with Sapphires, the only Gems that no one can produce except her. Yellow and White have tried, of course, and failed.

Impossible not to see the huge pair of pink legs that sit at the end of the square. So here is her famous ship, the one that everyone talks about constantly. Blue and Yellow's ships are in the shape of an arm, and White's a body. Pink inherited the legs, literally the most subordinate of any positions.

“ _She's beautiful, isn't she?_ ”

“ _Who is?_ ”

“ _Your ship, of course! White made me work on it for weeks!_ ”

“ _I imagine that this could only be her idea._ ”

“ _Indeed! Legs, nothing less! She still sees you as the force that sustains us! I imagine this is... appropriate._ ”

Pink hadn't looked at the problem so positively. She finds it charming that Yellow is suddenly so optimistic, but she doubts that White actually saw the gift that way.

“ _Okay, let's get to work! Everyone gets on board! Forward!_ ” Yellow concludes, pointing at the horizon.

Pink’s pearl arrives just then, settling next to her mistress. Her outfit is intended for space travel. She remains silent. This departure seems terrifying to her. The poor little one does not want to leave, but will follow her matriarch wherever necessary. Pink Diamond starts moving. She approaches the vehicle with determination in her steps, climbs aboard and sits in front of the controls. As the Diamond prepares for takeoff, her foot slips: the pair of legs fly up in such a ridiculous way that any individual with a minimum of wit would burst out laughing in a second. Her Pearl remains impassive and simply says:

“ _A magnificent takeoff, my Diamond!_ ”

Pink chuckles. It was an inelegant start, but what does it matter? Nothing can scare her anymore. Her second chance awaits at the end of this path into the unknown. In a few years, she will have it in her hands and... her mistakes will finally disappear into oblivion. Soon. Very soon. You just have to keep hoping.


End file.
